Her Home, Our Breakfast, Saturday and Others

We've been lucky.. to share a rainy saturday's beautiful breakfast..

and laughters..

.. having been given the days to hold each other's babies hands, diseases, husbands, sorrow, worries, bliss, crisis, ..sundays, saturdays, mondays, wednesdays, tuesdays, thursdays, fridays.

We were lucky having days like this and having each other.
It was a beatiful saturday at her home,
like many days,
together.

Chocolate Fell Down

Do you have your big own pleasures taking you away from the ones that love you? Do you have.. like.. addictions.. for adrenaline, sex, alcohol, speed, drugs ?



Did you ever love someone that you knew you have to let him be the way he is and just kept on loving even when love aches and breaks your each part?



Or have you been of those that were blamed on not letting them be despite the thread?

Yesterday when I was serving dinner for my friend I and his lovely daughter Asya, Chikolata(means Chocolate in turkish) disappeared. Asya(6) tried to relieve me that he was walking outside the window.

How he loves to do that.. This challenge, this wind on his face. Smelling the pine woods and watching the bugs and birds flying around.

I could not take this from him. But I always have been careful and watched him over as he went outside the window.

Well.. yesterday night he was not there anymore. At the end, I found him under a pine tree in the garden. He fell down from the 5th floor! No wounds but 2 legs seriously injured and I am watching him over for he is under the risk of inner hemorrage and he must have hit his head and neck as well which scares me even more.

Chocolate has been my companion for almost 5 years now. The photo above is from his early times where he was left to me by my mother and family members as they were going all on holiday. Initially he was my mother's choice despite my cat allergies. We were living together then. After those times where everybody left for holidays, we were together and alone. That is how we had this bond. He became my tiger, my baby and my soulful companion through the years and through hard days and nights.



Two years ago he saved Thomas' life when Thomas was 3 weeks old and left by his mother to death. He warmed him and licked him, played with him and educated him through the domestic life.

Our home is silent now. I tried to keep my self awake through the night and watched Chocolate's chest. We are waiting for the critical first 3 days to be over.Yesterday Asya smoothed me with her beautiful smile saying: "Thank God we were here Dad"

So true..

Do you know the pain of ..

Did you ever love and had to let him go to let him be?

A Crispy Morning Towards the Office

From Pelin's I headed my way from the Anatolian side towards the office:

passed by the park

took the bus

crossed the bridge..

arrived at the terminus

took the stairs..

came out ..

contemplated the traffic ..

arrived at the office,

wondering about what to plan for the coming holiday break

The Mercedes I Loved

Before I was 5, I had this nickname Mercedes from my father's driver Sherif Abi where as my older sister was nicknamed Anadol. Although sis and I, we did not know why those names were given, we both loved our nicknames each.

Well, at those days, Mercedes was the best car for Sherif Abi, and Anadol, a national ordinary car. Now I understand that it must have been a delicate way of having a favorite one :)

I have never been into cars but I kept the sweet memories of the dusty town I grew up, the light green mercedes parked in front of our apartment and my soulful Sherif Abi that I currently have the chance to occasionally see at family funerals, holidays or happy gatherings. I see Life passing through us, our hair, our skin, our glances, our postures,.. our smiles. I watch Life do sweetly, slowly sometimes swiftly what it does to all if given a chance.

Thanks
to Life,
to Mercedes Sosa (who passed away the day before yesterday) and to B that I always loved that I first heard this beautiful song from..

Click here to see the video and to listen:

Thanks to Life

By Violeta Parra

Thanks to Life that gave me so much

Gave me two bright stars,

when I open themI perfectly distinguish

the black from the white

And the starred background of the high sky

And in the crowds the man I love.

Thanks to Life that game me so much,

Gave me the hearing which in all its width

Night and day captures the cricket and the canary,

Hammers, turbines, barks and squalls

And the tender voice of my beloved.

Thanks to Life that gave me so much

Gave me the sound and the alphabet,

And along the words I think and declare:

Mother, Friend, Brother, and Light illuminating

The way to the soul of whom I loved.

Thanks to Life that gave me so much,

Gave me the march of my tired feet,

With them I walked cities and ponds,

Beaches and deserts, mountains and plains,

And the house of yours, your street and your backyard.

Thanks to Life that gave me so much,

Gave me a heart that flutters in its cage

When I see the fruit of the human brain,

When I see the good, so far from the bad,

When I see the bottom of your light eyes.

Thanks to Life that gave me so much,

Gave me the laughter and gave me the crying,

Thus I can distingish joy and sadness,

The two materials of which my song is made,

And the song of yours that is the same,

And the song of all, which is my own song

These are the photos of Biffy and I, taken each year at the doorway of Malcolm. Biffy was our imaginary dog with an ex-lover, the son of Malcolm. Biffy was in our dreams of our life together along with our imaginary daughter Lilly and our imaginary friend Shui.

This dog just the dog we have imagined years, years ago came to visit me every year whenever I went down to visit Malcolm. So I knew it was Biffy. The real Biffy.

And above is Malcolm's favorite tree: a huge eucaliptus tree and if you pay enough attention, you can see me hugging it down below.

Forgive me real Mercedes and real Violeta for forgetting lately about being thankful to life for the men I loved.

My heart aches still for each of them.. Deeply, nobly, quietly.

Faithfully.

For they had been my homes in time.

Do you have a favorite street that leads to your lover, to his backyard, to his house?

Are you thanking to Life?

Take it easy babe..

It's been a hard day's night.. or it's been a hard night's day.. Yeah better this way.
Well we went to this "farewell to the summer and to Murat" party. Well Murat being a lovely collegue at my previous office who departs for his military service soon.
Anyway.. it has been quite a party.. A night that ended.. actually it didn't end, I had to watch H over that had the most terrible drunkness and hangover ever. I mean have you seen someone suffacating in her sleep since she is asleep but still going on with the vomiting process with the 4th session.

So here we are back in peace, cats and everyone, me on the knees of a dear friend, taking pictures, recovering from our hillarious but very tiring night.

A good confession: Yesterday, at the party, I envied the couples I saw after months. That endured the crisis, the mass layoffs and all.. I was tired before all drunkness and hangover story

So "take it easy babe..".
This is what we shall tell our selves during recovery, right?

To Fulfill and To Fill In

Here is another peaceful sunny day, another day after the friends are gone.
Friends - Guests to fullfil and to fill in my home

LoveBirds Around the City

M from my posts in Bahrain came to visit Istanbul.

After my glucose high ramadan bayram, I went on enjoying the sweets.

I must stop somewhere.